A Lifetime Together

[Valentine]

An exerpt from "All I Really Need to Know I learned in Kindergarten" by Robert Fulghum



Remember Charles Boyer? Suave, dapper, handsome, graceful. Lover of the most famous and beautiful ladies of the silver screen. That was on camera and in the fan magazines. In real life it was different.

There was only one woman. For forty-four years. His wife, Patricia. Friends said it was a lifelong love affair. They were no less lovers and friends and companions after forty-four years than after the first year.

Then Patricia developed cancer of the liver. And though the doctors told Charles, he could not bear to tell her. And so he sat by her bedside to provide hope and cheer. Day and night for six months. He could not change the inevitable. Nobody could. And Patricia died in his arms. Two days later Charles Boyer was also dead. By his own hand. He said he did not want to live without her. He said, "Her love was life to me."

This was no movie. As I said, it's the real story--Charles Boyer's story.

It's not for me to pass judgement on how he handled his grief. But it is for me to say that I am touched and comforted in a strange way. Touched by the depth of love behind the apparent sham of Hollywood love life. Comforted to know that a man and woman can love each other that much that long.

I don't know how I would handle my grief in similar circumstances. I pray I shall never have to stand in his shoes. But there are moments when I look across the room--amid the daily ordinariness of life--and see the person I call my wife and friend and companion. And I understand why Charles Boyer did what he did. It really is possible to love someone that much. I know. I'm certain of it.

[Man in Black]

That reminds me of when my Grandmother died... it was the only time I ever remember seeing my Grandfather cry. They were like one person. I'll never forget the loss on his face at that moment, it was the saddest thing I've ever seen.

[Valentine]

But its comforting to hear that her death finally made him cry. What a great love story...growing old together, becoming one more and more throughout the years.

Just thinking about it brings a tear to my eye

[Man in Black]

I actually have a short story I wrote in college that was inspired by that situation... I'll have to see if I can find it.

[Valentine]

Please do! I'm a total sucker when it comes to stories like these! ;D

[Marii]

That's beautiful Valentine,
It seems that nowadays a love like that is rare. Especially in hollywood!
It seems like all the cowboys are gone, and all the chivalrous, noble men and lovely ladies are vanishing. It seems the younger generations are mistaking lust for love, and that true love has become an old fashioned thing of little importance... when in fact, "if we have not love, we have nothing" It breaks my heart to see a couple really in love and then someone comes and tries to take one away because they are cute, with so many other fish in the sea...

MIB, I think your grandfather's generation is the last of the true gentlemen, those qualities diminish with each generation, and it is unfortunate. I hope we can raise our child to be someone like that, that others see as special and wonderful and want to be like him

Where I work, the older men always open doors for their wife, carry the bags, help them sit down and stand up, and are kind and helpful.. some even hold hands on the way out, it's beautiful. Then the younger they get, the men open doors just for themselves, while the wife struggles with the children and diaper bags... they cuss at eachother over little matters, each is on a cell phone making me and the people in line wait, they look desiringly at others in the store while their spouse is there beside them!!!

It makes you feel like you should have been born in another time...